lickyrlolli

Actress Lindsay Lohan recently ended a very rocky relationship with DJ Samantha Ronson. There’s been so much tabloid press over the breakup it’s sickening, with rumors swirling that Ronson was cheating, that she recently got her locks changed, and that Linds is desperate, suicidal, on drugs, etc. Say what you want about Lohan, she is a decent actress with solid comic timing. Post-breakup, she starred in a “Funny or Die” video that spoofs an eHarmony personal ad. Lohan pokes fun at herself and the tabloid mania that surrounds her every move. The newly single actress says she’s ”looking for someone I can spend the rest of my life with… or at least the rest of my probation with.” See the vid here.

The UK’s Daily Mail recently reported that model Kate Moss and beau Jamie Hince of the band the Kills have split. The couple had a tumultous courtship, and tabloid reports constantly had them either engaged or breaking up. This time, however, the relationship is believed to be over for good, and The Mail says Moss’ hard partying ways may be to blame. A source says, “Kate thinks there is no going back this time and has told Jamie to keep away from her. Although she has said that before, she has never appeared as hurt as this and the rows have never been this bad.”

Moss has been partying it up extra hard since the break-up. Perez Hilton has been chronicling her late nights out, with photographs of a woozy Moss being steered into her car in the early hours of the morning. Now that she’s single, will she be tempted to reunite with former flame and perpetual junkie, Pete Doherty? Pete + Kate 4-eva!

British pop star George Michael was busted for drug possession this weekend. He was arrested in a public lavatory as the Brits say, after the loo attendent reported him for loitering. The drugs are said to include marijuana and crack. Crack?! I didn’t know he was that far gone. Cops confirmed that a 45-year-old man was arrested on Hampstead Heath, where the Victorian South End Green bathrooms are an infamous meeting spot for gay men who go cruising around the Heath. The area is a quick drive from the mansion Michael shares with partner Kenny Goss.

In 1998, Michael was busted for engaging in lewd conduct in a public restroom in California. In 2006, he was twice arrested for drug offenses. Michael released a statement last night, in which he said, “I want to apologise to my fans for screwing up again and to promise them I’ll sort myself out. And to say sorry to everybody else, just for boring them.” Oh George. The 90’s were a good time for him, but the 00’s–not so much.

Former Access Hollywood host Pat O’Brien was in Iowa recently, communing with the common folk, when he had a revelation: the average Iowan couldn’t care less about entertainment shows like The Insider and ET. Upon his return, O’Brien wrote an email to the staff of both shows telling them just that. He writes: ”I was approached a hundred times by people asking, ‘Can you help us?’ I tried to tell them we care, but they didn’t buy it. They wanted to, but watching Anya and Lara [Spencer] pick out accessories makes the viewers want to vomit.” He adds, “I’ll get killed for this, but I’m actually the one not afraid for my job. I want people to be happy.”

You may remember O’Brien from the series of sexually explicit voicemails that were leaked in 2005. He’d left a string of cringe-inducing messages on a woman’s voicemail. Listen to them here.

The object of his affection was never revealed, but the messages were played on The Howard Stern Show and across the internet. O’Brien entered rehab for alcoholism and substance abuse and later returned to The Insider as a correspondent. He was in rehab again in 2008. His righteous email seems to signal that he’s suddenly turned serious journalist, or more likely, he’s off the wagon. According to reports, he’s also out of a job. A rep for the show confirmed to Page Six that O’Brien had been fired.

Five days ago, the Associated Press broke the news that actor David Duchovny had entered rehab for sex addiction. How did I not know about this until now? And of all the addictions, who would have thought that the man behind Fox Mulder would fall prey to this one? So un-Mulder of him. Duchovny lovers must hate themselves for not meeting him pre-treatment.

Duchovny has been married for 10 years to actress Tea Leoni, and they have two children together. Leoni was scheduled to promote her new movie Ghost Town at the Toronto Film Festival this week, but she’s decided to skip it.

According to the great and powerful TMZ, actress Mackenzie Phillips was recently arrested at Los Angeles International Airport for possession of heroin and cocaine. The site reports that syringes and baggies believed to contain drugs were found on her person during a security screening. Phillips was acting suspicious and jittery before the search, and then during it, “a plastic bag containing an [unknown] white substance later identified and tested…positive for cocaine fell down her right pant leg.”

48-year-old Phillips is the daughter of the Mamas and the Papas singer John Phillips, who struggled with drugs and alcohol himself. She is best known for her roles in American Grafitti and the TV show One Day at a Time. Phillips began having serious drug problems in the 80’s, and was subsequently fired from the show, twice. She was in and out of rehab for years, but was clean at least for a period in the ’90s, appearing on the Disney channel show So Weird and Caroline in the City. Phillips, who was reportedly headed to a One Day reunion at the time of her arrest, was released on $10,000 bail.

Amy Winehouse left her London apartment for the first time in two weeks yesterday, and for her it was a typical night out: a few (dozen) pints, assault, and a lot of profanity.

The singer’s been laying low after an overnight stay at the hospital in late July. Winehouse was taken to the emergency room after suffering from what her spokeperson called an adverse reaction to medication. Her people blamed the treatment she’s undergoing to wean herself off hard drugs. Her father, Mitch Winehouse, later alleged that she’d been dosed with E by one of her “hangers-on.”

Whatever happened, it hasn’t stopped her bizarre and violent outbursts. On Thursday, Winehouse attended a fundraiser at a Camden pub with her god-daughter. As they were leaving, her bodyguards clashed with the paparazzi, and Winehouse naturally joined in the scuffle. She chucked a pint glass at a photographer, then allegedly slapped a bystander. The pictures below of Winehouse looking like a tanorexic skeleton pretty much sum up the story of her night:

Celebrity stylist Rachel Zoe, aka Skeletor, opened up about her eating habits in a recent interview with Harper’s Bazaar. Nicole Richie’s former stylist (and possible thin-spiration) insists that she does masticate on occasion, just not at mid-day. When asked about her typical lunchtime fare, she ‘fesses up: ”I’m not a lady who lunches; it’s a lull in the day. When I’m on downtime like on vacation . . . I take care of myself. But when it’s me working on my own, it’s 7 p.m. and I’ve had coffee and a grapefruit.” So, like Lara Flynn Boyle and other scary-thin stars before her, she simply forgets to eat. Basic human needs can seem so trivial when you’re in the fashion industry. I’m sure she goes without shelter all the time too!

Comedian Andy Dick’s been arrested for doing pervy, sexual things while out of his mind on drugs again. It’s not really news-worthy, but his mug shot is way frightening. I don’t know what kind of look he’s going for, I guess halfway house chic. I bet he smells really bad.

According to the L.A. Times, police were called at around 1 a.m. to a Buffalo Wild Wings restaurant after a man was seen peeing outside. (From now on, if you see a man peeing in public, just assume it’s Andy Dick and run.) When police arrived, a 17 year-old female said Dick had pulled down her shirt while exiting the restaurant.

Police arrested Dick as he tried to leave the scene in a truck, thankfully driven by someone else. The policeman reported that Dick was “extremely intoxicated,” and they found Xanax and pot in his pockets. I’m not even going to try to recount all the incidents of this kind in Dick’s past, as I already feel kind of sick.

People Magazine is reporting that eternal babe Heather Locklear has checked into a medical facility in Arizona. Her rep, Cece Yorke, confirmed reports, adding that “Heather has been dealing with anxiety and depression. She requested an in-depth evaluation of her medication and entered into a medical facility for proper diagnosis and treatment.”

The 46-year-old actress has had a rough, messy couple of years. In 2006, she filed for divorce from Richie Sambora, with whom she has a 10-year-old daughter. Sambora subsequently had a very public fling with Locklear’s former friend, Denise Richards. He made the tabloids again this past spring, when he was busted for DUI. The couple’s daughter and a friend were his passengers.

Shortly after, the police received a 911 call, supposedly from one of Locklear’s friends, who (wrongly, it turned out) believed Locklear to be suicidal. A rep claimed the call was a mix-up, saying, “[I] spoke with Heather and she is fine. She never requested medical assistance and did not place a 911 call, nor did anyone from her house call 911 or place a call requesting medical assistance.” Hmm, kinda fishy. Good luck to Heather!